I don’t believe I’ll ever run out of material for this column because if I ever need to reach for something to write about, I can reach, with trembling hands, into the bag of perilous terror of living in Central Florida. Today, I pull out a very real scene of me, on my front lawn, watching a snake slide out of our drainage grating. My wife’s already assured me it’s a black … [Read more...]

If you’ve been reading “Sunny Side Up” for any time now, you’ll know that I do my best to never complain about life in Central Florida. I despise writers who waste perfectly good real-estate in our papers by stooping to mindless rants. They’re lazy writers who couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn with a good word. So, on an extremely positive note, I thought that I’d … [Read more...]

This morning, I’m trying to shake a nightmare containing a 20-foot alligator, some wobbly docks, and a whole lot of not being able to run. I blame last night’s movie: Jumanji. Usually, with the morning comes relief, but as I peek out the window, my backyard looks exactly like … you guessed it, Jumanji. My home, like most in Central Florida I suppose, serves as a … [Read more...]

I wish that whoever came up with robocalls had also invented time travel. Then, when we catch him, and we will, we can take him to one of the most mind-numbing moments of his life and put him on loop forever ...  We could even record this, a truly terrible idea, and turn it into the second worst movie in history. We’d name it Robocall, The Movie after the timeless … [Read more...]

Believe it or not, I’ve never read anything about “Florida Man.” But I hear the scuttle about him. He takes up a lot of the news cycle about Florida, and I’m thinking, He’s not the only dude in Florida, why does he get to hog all the limelight? So I’ve come up with a list of stories that the press should cover about real – pinch us, we’re real – Florida men.  Florida Man … [Read more...]